Divine chaos

The fire and the wind has passed me.

What is it that You want from me?

No I don't have the strength to do what You want me to do.

No, I just want to live my life, why did You bring this upon me?

I don't even know whether is it You, or just my human desire to do something of value to substantiate my existence, to prove that I am worthy of love...

I am just one in 6.5 billion.

Am I more than just a bunch of molecules held together by some cosmic force that I do not comprehend?

What is going on in this divine chaos?